A GREAT START TO AN INTERESTING REUNION

                                                                                                                                                                                                                 

                             

                          A GREAT START TO AN INTERESTING REUNION 

As I dropped my bags at the front desk “Randy” a bright looking young clerk with an oversize nametag on his lapel looked up.

“May I help you sir?” He said in a rather bored tone.

“Ah yes, You have a reservation for John Wilson, I believe.” I said.

“Just a sec. Sir.  Oh yes here it is, you will be with us for three days is that correct?”

“Yes that’s correct.”

“Smoking or non?” 

“Non, please. Oh and by the way I have a friend arriving a little later who will be sharing the room.” I replied.

“OK sir, and what is her name.”

“Her name is George Lucas.”

“Her name is George.” The clerk stammered with one eyebrow about 2 inches higher than the other.

“Sorry I thought I was being humorous. I guess I’m losing my touch.” I said.

“He is a he.”

 Maybe this young man wasn’t so bright after all.

“ Oh I see sir, ha ha.” He replied dryly.

“ If possible we would like a room with a view over the river.”

“OK let me see,… sorry sir the only room we have overlooking the river has 2 beds.”

“Well, what’s the problem with 2 beds, did you think I wanted three?” I replied starting to lose a little patience.

“ Oh, well, I ….well…. I just thought you would like one bed.” The little twerp replied.

“Look we want two beds. As far apart as possible.” I said. “One bed, why on earth would I want one bed?”

Than it started to dawn on me.

“So you think I’m one of those, do you.”

“Well …no,… I mean I don’t know, I mean I’m sorry sir.”

“This is certainly a first, I’ve been accused of being many things in my life but never of being one of those.” I said maybe a touch to loudly. “ Not that I have any pregidice against them mind you, it’s just that I don’t want to be mistaken for one.”

I noticed several heads in the lobby swivel our way.

“Would you please keep your voice down sir.”

“OK, OK never mind, just give me the keys.”

“It’s room 810, to your right out of the elevator.”

“Thanks”

I had come up with this idea for a little reunion of old school buddies a few months earlier. We had decided to meet in Saskatoon this weekend after an absence of about 40 years for most of us.  George and I had been best friends those many years ago and we had still kept contact over the years. This however would be the first we had spent any time together for quite awhile.  We always got a kick out of kidding each other. George is a little bit eccentric and definitely marches (well at least limps) to his own drum. I must admit I usually received pure enjoyment out of making George the fall guy for my vaunted wit 

We decided we would share a room at the hotel.

So a few hours later, just after I had got into bed, George arrived. He had got his key from the front desk.

“ Hi John, been here long.” He said as he put his bag and leather purse down on the next bed. I looked at him. Six foot, blond, slim (well not fat), very fair complexion, purse…. purse.

“No I Just got into bed. What the hell are you doing carrying a stupid purse?” I said, visions of the twerp downstairs dancing in my head.

“It’s not a purse you twit, it’s a carryall bag, very handy.”

“Looks like a purse to me.”

“That’s strange, the desk clerk made some strange remark about my purse but I didn’t quite catch it so I ignored him.

“ Oh great.”

“ Yeah, actually he was a very strange fellow, when I asked for my key he made a big production about how you had made all the arrangements and that it definitely had two beds.”

“ I don’t find that strange at all.” I said a little relieved.

“But you wouldn’t believe his reaction when I asked him why in hell I would want two beds?” George continued. “The clerks reply all the while getting red in the face, sounded something like this.”

“Well I ..I .. Mr. Wilson,.. he,… well he, look why don’t you two just work it out yourselves.”

“Anyway he gave me this key to 810, I had forgotten about you saying we would share a room until I was unlocking the door.” George said.

“That’s just bloody great, just great. I go to great lengths to make sure he realizes we are super straight, then you come in, hit him with your purse, and demand we sleep in one bed.”

“ It’s not my fault I look like a homosexual” George whined.

“You don’t look like a homosexual, anyway I don’t even know what a homosexual looks like and I don’t care.”

“Anyway it was a great flight from Toronto, we actually got in a little early.” George said. “Well let’s get to bed and we can get up early tomorrow and have a little walk around our old town before breakfast.” 

George went around to the other side of his bed and started rummaging around with his things. He has always been a bit of a disorganized rummager.

“Any idea what this is?” He said holding up my cellular battery charger.

“It’s the charger for my phone battery, leave it alone.”

“It was plugged into the receptacle on my side.”

“So?”

“I want to use it, can I plug it in somewhere else?”

“Sure but I couldn’t find another plug, why don’t you just leave it where it is?” I said.

“ I want to use the plug for my machine.”

“What machine?”

“Never mind, I know you you’ll just laugh at me.”

“No I won’t.”

“You always laugh at me.”

“No I don’t.”

“Lynda doesn’t laugh at me.”

“I won’t laugh at you, and besides Lynda is much nicer than me.”

“That’s true.”

So after putting on his white night gown with the frills around the bottom, (God how I wish I had never given him the idea of wearing a nightshirt those many years ago) he started to unpack his contraption. To me it looked exactly like the oxygen mask a dying person might wear in a hospital.

“I have had a bit of a problem with snoring over the last few years, I went to a sleep clinic and they found out I have a rather mild form of Sleep apnea.”

“Is that where you stop breathing for a while?”

“Yeah, but mine isnt to bad yet, anyway this thing stops my snoring and it forces air into my mouth and for some reason if I stop breathing this sort of kick starts me back again.”

“They said at the clinic by using this thing I might live another 6 months or so.”

With that, he plugs in this thing and I immediately notice a rather loud whirring sound.

I really do not like whirring sounds.

“I makes a little noise, but not to bad is it.” George said looking at me with his saddest beagle expression on his face.

“Naw, it’s not to bad, how about us getting some sleep.”

George proceeded to untangle all the hoses and things and turned off the light before he actually put the contraption on.  I could hear all sorts of grunting and mumbling to himself as I assumed he was trying to get comfortable.

“ There, all set now, see you in the morning.” George said sounding as if he was in a tunnel with a clothespin on his nose. 

I couldn’t help myself I just had to turn on the light.

There was George lying on his back with this clear plastic mask covering most of his face, a large hose from it pulsating to the rhythm of the pump.

“My God I feel like Im sleeping next to an old man on his death Bed, are you sure you’re not going to croak before morning?”

“No it feels great, I actually like it, and I get a much better sleep.” He nasals between pumps.

“Why don’t you just forget about the extra six months?”

“ I want to live to be a hundred.”

“I think I might be lucky to get through the next 3 days.”

So it appeared George went to sleep OK, although it was rather hard to tell with the whirring and pumping.  Maybe he was getting a good nights sleep, however I on the other hand was not.  I kept waking all night long, listening and peering into the dark at his bed and wondering if George had quit breathing since I couldn’t tell with all the whirring and pumping if he was alive or not.  George awoke totally refreshed.

I on the other hand awoke feeling as though I had been pulled through a knothole.
That evening was an interesting beginning to an eventful three days.